Thursday, September 15, 2005
“NOW I KNOW WHY”
I am ashamed that it has been 4 weeks since I have posted in my journal. I didn’t even remember what I wrote until I re-read it. I don’t usually read things I have previously written. But I had to do so this time. When I read what I wrote I sort of understood why I haven’t been back to the journal.
It isn’t like nothing has been going on. I just realize that I didn’t know how to write what’s been going on and keep it short and not sound like whining. So I haven’t written anything! But I need to give it a shot, so here goes.
I’ve allowed myself to become stressed over a combination of things. None are particularly devastating taken individually. It seems to be the combination. It is a good thing that I have probably blocked out a lot of what has gone on that has contributed to my stress lately. But I am aware of enough to keep me disturbed.
My annual study leave in August was more stressful than usual. It seems there were things to deal with at church that took away from what little time I had for study. Not bad things, really, just “things”. We have introduced a number of changes and most have been well accepted. The girl from our church who was committed to going to the Ukraine as a missionary suddenly (or it seemed sudden to us) decided not to go. We had a commitment Sunday and raised about half of her required monthly support. It was an excellent response for our smaller congregation. We would have committed more had we had more time. But after the first Sunday she decided not to go! That was a shock and a major disappointment for our church. At least we are thankful that she didn’t get over there and decide to come right back! But that whole situation, in addition to the changes we were implementing beginning in September, required much attention right in the middle of my study leave. I didn’t get the books read that I had hoped to read. I think next year I’m going to have to take some vacation time and go away somewhere for part of the study leave if Karon can be left alone.
At my “day job” they decided to move several of us from our offices to a less-desirable location in the same building. And I had to do some traveling during that time which made the move even more difficult. Also, someone “higher up” decided I have to get a State Insurance Agent’s license for Life and Health insurance. I’m not an insurance agent, I don’t sell insurance and I don’t plan to sell insurance. But they say I have to have a license. So---I’ve got two 81/2 X 11 one inch-thick books to study and 2 CDs to listen to. It is a ton of stuff to try to learn and remember for testing. I’ve got to get through these books before October 3rd. October 3rd through the 6th I spend each day in class, 8 to 5, with homework every night! Then following the classes I have to pass this 2½-hour test. All this is in addition to my regular duties at my day job. Plus I have responsibilities getting ready for our fall emphasis at church and trying to prepare for the fall sermons. Lots going on and most all of these things are good but just overwhelming.
We’re kind of in a holding pattern regarding Karon’s health right now. Yesterday was doctor and chemotherapy day. We had hoped to learn something one way or another as a result of the scans she had done last week. But as is so often the case, the tests weren’t conclusive. They did some additional X-Rays yesterday on the leg that gives her so much pain. We won’t know the results of that for a while. The scans showed some lessening of the lesions in some areas of the bones and some increased lesions in other places. There is a little spot on her liver that concerns me but didn’t seem to overly concern the oncologist. She will have 2 more chemo treatments after yesterday then they will do more scans. The doctor said we would make some decisions based on those results. It will be Monday before we know if the cancer count has decreased any further or not.
Guess I’ve whined enough for one Post. I’ll try to be more upbeat and have something to say of more general interest in the next Post. So many people in the South have so much more trouble than I could ever experience. As I see and hear the news from there it helps me to be thankful. Our church has partnered with our old church to provide items to help fill a couple of semi-trucks that went to Mississippi and Louisiana. We have also provided financial aid. Our church is very generous.
Jim
posted by jim 4:15 PM 2 comments
Comments:
Jim, it's good to hear from you - whining or not! I've been thinking about you and Karon alot and wondering how y'all were doing. Yes, things can be stressful and I know how easy it is to become somewhat reclusive and stand-offish from the world as we know it. KNOW that I love you two and I'm here.
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