Wednesday, June 09, 2004
THOUGHTS ON BEING A CARE GIVER
Karon was discharged from the Rehab Center last Friday evening. She is at home, bound to a wheelchair, walker or her “lift” chair. She goes to Rehab 3 times a week. They will provide transportation in a wheel chair van for a cost of $10 round trip. We have used it once so far. She has to be non-weight bearing on the leg for a total of 8 weeks.
This has been a most painful experience for her and the doctor told me it would very slow and painful during the next few weeks due to the severity of the break. He placed a rod and several “screws” to hold the rod in place.
We are trying to re-arrange our lives to accommodate her current situation. The house has been prepared to accommodate a wheelchair and walker.
BOY! I had no conception that this care giving would consume so much of a person's time. It seems as if every minute is spent in some form of care giving. And Karon is somewhat ambulatory and able to do many things for herself! I can't imagine what it would be like if the afflicted person were a paraplegic or a quadriplegic! As it is, there doesn't seem to be a spare minute in my day to even think of ministry or to do anything else. I've been only working half-days (and to be honest, not really even that much!)
I didn’t preach at my church the Sunday after Karon fell and broke her hip. The next Sunday Joel preached and I attended with all three of our girls! Anita was home over the Memorial Day weekend. I preached last Sunday but honestly I don’t know how I managed to find time to prepare! It is a good thing I had some idea of what I wanted to share from the Word. Ladies from our former church, Traders Point Christian Church, stayed with Karon mornings I had to be gone, including last Sunday morning.
The two churches, Traders Point and Countryside, have been excellent to us. Both churches are cooperating in providing food for us and house cleaning. The Traders Point church has meals scheduled through September! There is a crew that sees to mowing our lawn. Anything else we need, we just have to ask. But you know that may be one of the hardest parts of this life experience for me – the asking. It seems as though I should be able to care for my wife and household situation as the husband and man of the house! But because of the shoulder surgery a few months ago and the many “hats” I wear, it is difficult to find the time and the physical strength to accomplish everything. My blood pressure, which is usually well within the desired range, has shot “sky high” and it keeps climbing. If it hits the dangerous level I may have to give in and call my doctor.
I suppose I am whining. I don’t want to be a “complainer”. I know there are lessons to be learned from all this. I just pray that I will be a gracious “student” as God continues to teach me and refine me. I know that I have failed Him in a couple of very important areas during this time – of which I am aware. There are no doubt other areas I have failed to glorify God with my life.
Joel preached from Psalm 119:1-24. It was an excellent message (as his always are!) The Holy Spirit used Joel’s message to really convict me. Verses 5 and 6 of that Psalm really got my attention: “Oh, that my ways were steadfast in obeying your decrees! Then I would not be put to shame when I consider all your commands.” I have not been steadfast in obeying and I have thus been ashamed.
I have neglected my Quiet Times in the Word. And when that happens, other things “go to pot” as well. I have failed in another area with which I struggle constantly. I think partly I got prideful and let my guard down. Then Satan moved in and I fell for his deceptive temptations. So my prayer life suffered a bit also.
Hopefully my God and I are getting back on better terms again. Please understand He didn’t fail me – as is always the case, I failed Him.
Enough of this. Hopefully I’ll post again before another 2 weeks! Karon was supposed to have her surgical staples removed this afternoon. However, her doctor had an emergency and they re-scheduled it for Friday. I hope his “emergency” didn’t involve a change in “Tee-time” on the golf course! (I know, I’m being cynical. Sorry.)
Jim
posted by jim 3:03 PM 0 comments
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