Funkyjimmer's Blog

Friday, March 26, 2004

OVERDUE

I know I am overdue for another Post. My intentions have been good but the performance has been lacking.

This has been a crazy week. Work is nuts--so much to do and increasing daily -- and so little time. Two out-of-town trips this week and more out-of-town trips each week for the next few weeks. Lots to prepare for this coming Sunday: Sunday morning message; Memorial service and message for Sunday afternoon; speaking at another church Sunday night.

All that and I had to go and get sick -- I mean really sick. Severe sore throat, stuffy, then runny nose, voice loss, just feel terrible, all that good stuff. From Wednesday until now I was completely wiped out but had to continue working. When I got home each night I collapsed in bed and got virtually nothing done. So I'm behind with everything and the post has had to wait.

I am a little improved but tomorrow (Saturday) won't be very productive either. Someone from church is coming to work on my lawnmowers--riding and push -- and do some other stuff that I can't do because of my recent shoulder surgery. And the service technician from Overhead Garage Doors will be servicing my garage door. Lots of activity tomorrow and not much time for study or preparation.

I hope these weak excuses and whinning will be sufficient explanation for now. I hope to do better next week--but can't promise. Work will probably continue crazy until about June first or so.

But we can always hope I'll do better! And I should be healthy again!

Jim

posted by jim 9:40 PM 0 comments

Thursday, March 18, 2004

MOURNING A LOSS

In my last Post I said I was mourning a loss. It is not the loss of a person or the loss of a relationship (although that has happened recently also.) Rather, this loss is of an inanimate, intangible nature.

Whenever we suffer loss of any kind we go through stages of grief: shock and denial; guilt and anger; depression and acceptance. This is true no matter the type of loss. It may be the death of a loved one, a friend or a pet; the loss of a relationship; the loss of a limb due to illness or accident; the loss of a job or a position within a job. It may be the loss of a spouse through divorce or a child leaving home for college. Any loss can plunge us into grief of varying intensity. Then we must go through the stages of grieving.

Not everyone goes through each stage of grieving in a set order. Nor does everyone spend an equal amount of time in each stage. Depending on the type and intensity of the loss, not everyone goes through every stage. The degree to which we experience each stage of the grieving process depends on the severity of the loss.

A very good friend – I would even call him my very best friend – has written an almost daily Journal, lacking only two days of being exactly two and one-half years. It is a very well written Journal; definitely worth the time spent reading it. My friend is very intelligent and an excellent writer. His Journal covers a wide variety of topics – things he has been personally doing, his emotions and feelings about things going on in his life and in the world around him. He has intelligently discussed relevant topics and issues in his local area and in the world. He has discernment and sound judgement.

For very good reasons my friend has decided that at least for now he will no longer write his Journal. This is the loss I mourn. It is not that my friend has done any thing wrong by discontinuing his Journal. He has very good reasons for discontinuing it at this time. It is the right thing for him to do.

But I have suffered a loss, nonetheless. It was a bright spot in my day to be able to open the Journal and read it. I looked forward to reading the Journal. Often I would go to the Journal several times a day and digest its contents. I have read every entry he ever made – all 500 of them.

Now I can no longer anticipate some new entry that will stimulate my own thinking. Actually my friend’s Journal was the motivation for the semi-regular entries in this Journal. When I began reading his Journal it was as though the floodgates were opened in my mind. I wanted to express my thoughts, too.

My friend lives a long way from me. The Journal was a way to keep in touch with him. A way to know what he was doing; what he was thinking and feeling about various subjects and issues. Through the Journal I came to know my friend very well and to understand him better. I am mourning the opportunity to keep in almost daily touch with my friend.

When a person mourns a loss, in some form he does go through the stages of grief I previously mentioned. I have thought about my mourning the loss of the Journal in relation to those stages of grief:

1) SHOCK? No. My friend had indicated to me that he might be coming to a time when he would no longer write the Journal.

2) DENIAL? Yes. I am experiencing some degree of denial. I still find myself going to the Journal several times a day to see if he has changed his mind and has written something after all.

3) GUILT? No. Nothing I did or didn’t do caused the loss of the Journal. I am no part of the reason my friend no longer writes the Journal. I don’t think so anyway.

4) ANGER? No. I have no reason to be angry with any of this. Anger is not relevant to this particular loss. It’s his Journal; he can do with it what he wants. Besides, I am not an anger-prone person anyway.

5) DEPRESSION? Yes, I can admit to some depression. I am a bit depressed to think I will no longer be able to read my friend’s Journal on a near-daily basis. I won’t know what he is experiencing, what he’s thinking and feeling about various issues and events. That is kind of depressing. I have a certain fear we may lose touch. I hope not. He is a person worth knowing and having as a friend.

6) ACCEPTANCE? Yes. I am beginning to move to the point of accepting that the Journal is no more. My grief is beginning to subside. Writing this Post is helping.

Other languages have more adequate words to express shades of meaning than does the English language. In English, the word, “farewell” has a ring of finality to it. It usually indicates that something will be no more. We lack a really good word to express a temporary departure. Sometimes we say, “So long,” or “See you”.
In Spanish there is “manana” – tomorrow. The French say, “au revoir”, or
“a bientot”.

I do hope the time will come when my friend will write in his Journal again. Until then I would say to my friend’s Journal, “Au revoir”, “a bientot”, “See you manana”, “So long!”

Thank you, my friend.

Jim

posted by jim 8:54 PM 0 comments

Friday, March 12, 2004

BACK FROM ATLANTA

Well, I'm back to the cold North from the warm South! A great trip. Good weather and no car trouble. All-in-all a pleasant trip. We saw only one accicent as we neared Atlanta on Interstate 75. Apparently a bad one. An SUV was upsidedown, wheels spinning, in the median. Personal possesions and people strewed about on the ground. But plenty of help was present and arriving. A nurse approached. You could tell by the Smock she was wearing. So we went on by. No emergency vehicles or law enforcement personnel were on the scene that we could tell.

I came back to a very busy week. (Thus the delay in Posting until now.) I have two major projects going on at the same time, both with nearly concurrent deadlines. Both involve a lot of telephone time and paperwork. Also some travel will be involved between now and approximaely June 1st. But it is going to be all right.

This weekend I have studying to do and Federal and State income tax information to collect and organize for my tax preparer. Enough to keep me out of trouble and enough to keep me from Posting as often as I would like.

My next Post should be more of my thoughts on Words and their effect. I have many thoughts I want to Post. I will get back to that topic. But my next post will be about mourning. I am mourning a loss. It is not the loss of a person but rather a loss of an inanimate, intangible nature. Your curosity aroused? I'll hopefully post about it sometime over the weekend.

Jim

posted by jim 3:42 PM 0 comments

Thursday, March 04, 2004

GOING TO ATLANTA, GEORGIA

Ah! Going South! Driving to Atlanta, Georgia. From 40-degree temperatures to nearly 80-degree temperatures. *Sigh* Tough job--but someone has to do it!

We will leave fairly early (not TOO early, mind you) tomorrow (Friday) morning. We'll spend Saturday and Sunday and part of Monday visiting our daughter and doing (hopefully) exciting things--like checking my email; watching some movies, MAYBE making a Post, probably some sight-seeing like to Lowe's, Wal-Mart, you know--all the good places worth visiting! (Of course church Sunday morning!)

We'll start back Monday and come on to Zionsville Tuesday, in time to attend our church's Small Group Bible Study. Oh, how I love that time with our small group. It is such great fellowship, great study of the Word and great sharing. And there is always something good to eat at the end, too.

Yep, a great time of the week for my spiritual growth.

Then it is back to work Wednesday. Which I don't mind either. I love my work and the people with and around whom I work.

So if anyone reads this and would care to pray for safe travel to and from--it would be appreciated. And you-all will continue in my daily prayers. There will be a lot of "wndshield time" some of which can be turned into prayer time.

The trip almost didn't happen! Monday I made an unplanned trip to the eye doctor because of some weird visual symptoms Sunday night. It turned out I developed something called "Vitreous Separation." This means the jell-like stuff between the lens of the eye and the retina on the back of the eye has come loose from the retina. After a somewhat miserable examination it was determined by the doctor that this is what had occured. The concern is that this will detach the retina or put a holel in the retina

I had more symptoms of a different more disturbing nature while driving the car last night. So another unplanned trip to the doctor this morning and another miserable examination. But nothing had changed and I was cleared to go to Atlanta. Please pray this this condition doesn't cause something worse. What is there won't improve but the prayer is it won't worsen either.

Gotta go finish up stuff that is work-related so I can be gone for 3 days!

Jim

posted by jim 4:47 PM 0 comments

Tuesday, March 02, 2004

BRASS TACKS CAN BE SHARP!

Now to continue my thinking on words and their power to bless or destroy. (I took a break from this subject of “words” in my last Post to write about the film, “The Passion of the Christ”.)

This Post, and probably a few more, will deal with criticism. I don’t like criticism. I don’t like to give it and I certainly don’t like to receive it. (Maybe that’s why I don’t have a comment board for this Journal—beside the fact that I don’t think this site offers that option.) I think not many people like to receive criticism.

But there are people who seem to thrive on giving criticism. I know a man of whom his church said, “_ _ _ _ _ has the ‘Gift of Criticism.’” I knew a lady in another church much like that man. She criticized everything and everyone. She would always begin her criticisms with the preface, “I don’t mean to criticize, but……….” and you knew some ugly criticism was coming.

The Bible teaches, “It is more blessed to give than to receive.” (Acts 20:35). That verse seems to appeal most to people who love to give criticism!

This makes me think of another old saying: “Let’s get down to ‘brass tacks’”. A person who says this usually means, “I’m going to let you have it now!” But it is also true that brass tacks can be sharp—especially if you have to sit on them!

I’ve been studying the book of Proverbs in a couple of venues. Proverbs can be a “hard read” if you just read it straight through. It is so constructed that it seems to bounce all over the place. I am teaching some of the principles found in Proverbs at my church on Sunday mornings, rather than a verse-by-verse study. There are so many great themes for practical living in Proverbs if you focus on them rather than each verse, which can seem so disconnected.

And I have been studying the Proverbs this past month in my daily devotions. One of the prominent themes in Proverbs is about our speech, the necessity and kinds of criticism, and the like.

One thing I have learned from studying this topic in Proverbs is that we all must recognize that we need criticism. We usually don’t want it but we need it – at least occasionally. Even the person who invites criticism by saying, “Tell me what you really think!” usually doesn’t mean that literally. Most often what they are really saying, usually without realizing it, is, “Tell me what I want to hear,” or, “Tell me what I already think.”

So, why do we need criticism? Because we are blind to our own faults. We can’t really see ourselves as others see us. That is probably a good thing in some cases. If we could see ourselves as others do, we probably couldn’t stand ourselves! We’d certainly understand why others couldn’t stand us sometimes!

We all practice self-deception and need correction. And much like the typist who can never accurately proofread his or her own typing, we cannot self-correct completely. One of the greatest gifts God can give us is other people who love us enough to help us make those corrections. The Apostles were a part of the foundation of the church, grown men who later distinguished themselves as leaders in the church. Yet they constantly had to be corrected by the Lord. Should we be any different?

I am awfully tired right now. But later I want to Post about the dangers of loveless criticism. Not all criticism is helpful.

Jim

posted by jim 2:53 PM 0 comments